I asked God to keep me hidden while I take a year to heal from my past, figure out my calling, and to start living out my purpose. Well God, you definitely are doing that for me. However, today I wish I wasn’t hidden. I sat in the pews of my church wishing I was finally there. I looked at the couple sitting in front of me with their new baby boy and wished I could be there.
I asked Him in a whisper, “when God, when will it be my turn?“
I stopped idolizing marriage, started loving my single season, started healing, started figuring out Justine, beginning to get out of my comfort zone, focusing on my relationship with God, and I appreciate every bit of it, but today was different. I felt loneliness creep in while I sat by myself at church, which is often, even though I’m surrounded by so many. How could I feel lonely? I started looking around for that single guy sitting alone too. Hey look at me, I’m sitting alone also. Maybe he’s the one. God tell him I’m the one. Very silly I know, but today was just one of those days. God knows when I’ll be ready, even I know I’m not prepared just yet.